I will never, ever, be able to make sense of why it was that Mick died at only 39 after valiantly living with brain cancer for three and half years.
He was widely loved and respected. Why did he not have the chance to live a longer, fuller life like most?
Mick’s loss, my loss, our young children’s loss, his parent’s loss and our friend’s loss deeply touched everyone who knew us or of us.
It prompted everyone to re-evaluate and remember what is important to them.
It still does.
When we catch up with friends or family, Mick is missing, yet the kids and I are continuing on. Creating a life without him. Seeking joy and play every day. Practicing gratitude for all the love in our life and everything that we have.
We share our story, when we meet new people. They too, are prompted to be thankful and to reassess how they want to live.
I will never make sense of why Mick died but what I do know is that our story makes others “come to their senses” even if it is just briefly.
They remember who they love, what they love, their priorities and to seize the moment.
Rainbows & Rollercoasters 
My husband michael died in october . I am in agony it hurts so much . We have a 10 year old who is ok .The GBM changed his dad so much i think he did a lot of his grieving in michaels last year .Michael never talked about dying and there are so many things i want to discuss with him , They say hindsight is a wonderful thing . Rubbish . Hindsight is cruel . no one tells you of the overwhelming paperwork and organisations you have to deal with . its scary and confusing and people are not nice on the phone or are too youndg and inexperienced to care or at least to offer aplatitude as a nod to social niceties . I am relieved to have got through another day at the end of the day . Sometimes the crying is too much . I try to lose myself in books reading til exhaustion allows me to sleep . My son was asked what he would get me for xmas and he said she just wants dad back . He cant stand my grief
Every day is so painful. Then Christmas time can amplify the loss and all the emotions even further. The paperwork etc is totally overwhelming when you have trouble thinking straight and getting through each day🙏