If I'm not careful, I become a grinch at Christmas time. My emotions can get the better of me. I support myself and the kids using several strategies and traditions so that despite our loss we feel connected, loved, grateful and cheerful throughout the lead up to Christmas and on the day itself.
I experienced time travel yesterday. It was intense and life affirming. It happened while I was attending a reunion morning tea at the pre-school my son last attended in 2012. The same year that my late husband died from brain cancer. My son was four and half years old and his sister was three. Now... Continue Reading →
What have I gleaned from my experience of the loss of my late husband that can ground me as I now grieve for the more recent loss of my father?
What do you do when dreams bring to light some of your thoughts and questions from your subconscious? Since my late husband died, I have had several confronting, poignant dreams that have prompted me to face truths and emotions. One particularly unsettling dream occurred several times. This is what happened. My recurring dream My... Continue Reading →
I am proud of my 8 year old daughter. Yesterday she was brave. In the face of loss and grief she chose love, kindness, creativity, compassion and gratitude. She lost her father five years ago to brain cancer when she was just three years old. Her grandfather (my father) died from Alzheimers disease three months... Continue Reading →
I had always hoped that I was psychologically strong enough, resilient enough and optimistic enough to cope with life's challenges without needing to see a counsellor. However, when a curveball of cancer knocked my young family off course, I conceded after some time that I needed to subdue my ego and seek counselling. Counselling sessions became a... Continue Reading →
Allowing chinks in the armor protecting my heart. Dating as a young widow. Also published in Elephant Journal - as "How to Love A Widow"
How many years can you operate in overdrive before finding that your energy tank (both physical and emotional energy) is at or close to empty? And then how long does it take to recover and refuel? I started considering these questions in my second year of grief. My body had minimal energy and all that was possible was the most... Continue Reading →
When you have young children, you meet people all the time through playgroups/daycare and then another new community when children start school. It is a time in your life when you usually share a lot of information about yourself to build friendships and support networks. You disclose what you do for work, how you live and from that you find commonalities. My husband and I had a significant difference to other parents that we met. We were riding the terminal brain cancer roller coaster.