Soothing and Shocking Condolences

Sympathy cards were comforting - and they were also jarring reminders of my new reality. I felt numb following my husband's funeral. Although the brain cancer rollercoaster ride had ended -  I was not ready to disembark from the ride and face all the aspects of loss. I was shaken. I was afraid that if I stood... Continue Reading →

What is hope?

My late husband, Mick, died from brain cancer three and a half years after he was diagnosed. Although the initial prognosis was bleak: Hope gave us the strength, the determination and the will to enjoy each moment. Hope sustained us. It gave us the courage to continue on each day. To live and to love. After Mick... Continue Reading →

Snow Domes

Snow Domes (or water domes as we call them in Sydney, Australia) remind me that swirling thoughts and emotions do come to rest. I live in Sydney where it does not snow and snow domes are hard to find. In our souvenir shops there are "Water Domes" for sale usually with images of beaches inside. You... Continue Reading →

Stepping Stones

My boyfriend's approach to getting to know my children.  My boyfriend and I have reached a point where we would like to spend more time together. Given his kids and mine are under ten years of age, spending more time together means spending time with each other’s kids as well. We are both mindful that... Continue Reading →

Introducing my late husband to my boyfriend

Just after I created this blog my boyfriend Darren said to me "This is a little out there - but you haven't introduced me to your late husband yet. I am reading about him on your blog, you mention him every now and then and there are photos in your house. Perhaps you should formally... Continue Reading →

Small acts of Kindness

Small unsolicited acts of kindness are like tiny rainbows that provide light and love through the heavy fog of grief and challenging times. People often say "Let me know there if there is anything I can do". When people said it to me I would usually smile and say thank you but rarely take them up on... Continue Reading →

Scans & Checkups: Mini -Rollercoasters within The Rollercoaster

Every scan, every check up is a mini rollercoaster. The anticipation, the preparation (the tests and scans), waiting in the waiting room to see the doctor, the review with the doctor and then hopefully the relief that is all ok - all is stable - until the next check up. My late husband, Mick, had a... Continue Reading →

Grief is Missing, and Missing is Love.

The kids and I miss my late husband every day. We feel his absence. So many triggers. Yet I am grateful for all the memories and the moments. Even though it hurts. I'm grateful for the love. Grief is missing. And Missing is Love. "I believe in missing things. I enjoy the feeling of missing. It doesn't have to imply... Continue Reading →

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